I'm falling in love...with my new town.

I'm enjoying the discovery of new places....faces....trails....insight.

Most change is not easy, but I'm finding that most change, when brought about through prayer and surrender is WORTH IT. 

Today as I was doing my weekly "long" run I was hit with the realization that, WHEN YOU FEEL THE MOST ALIVE IS WHEN YOU ARE MOST OK WITH DYING.

Two of My Therapists

That feels a bit heavy I know.  But after facing death and realizing how fleeting this life can be, how unpredictable it is, it makes since to me.

Grief does interesting things to your soul.  It can make you loose your sense of self....  Of SAFETY... Of BELONGING.... Of CERTAINTY. 

It can take you, gut you, leave you in a fog.  And the whole time you are in a stupor, feeling like you are MISSING THE BEST part of your life.

No matter how hard you try to clue in and get grounded in the present it slips through your fingers.

So with it comes fear of dying, of losing more than you have already.

FEAR CRIPPLES.  

And so in making peace with those fears, life comes, and acceptance, that all you can do is surrender to change, life, and the unpredictable.  Ultimately, for me, it was surrendering my fears to Jesus,  My Bridge.

Trail ran to the top of a hill today!!

 

Then the full life comes....the peace.  And suddenly its OK to LET GO..... 

Worth Remembering